Of detective shows and anticipation.

 Image from WeHeartIt.

Three down.
One to go.
Today was English literature. Two long hours of it. I think it went alright, although I hate a fair few of the texts. Still, got to answer the main question on Thomas Fabulous Hardy.
Media tomorrow. Oh God. Not much I can do about that.
And then.
It'll all be over (for this year, anyhow).
So I will hopefully have something more interesting to say. As it is, I am curled up on the sofa, cup-a-soup in one hand, watching Luther (I bloody love detective programmes). It's barely summer yet, but somehow watching this makes me wish it was winter again. And I wish I was by the river Thames, with my coat and hat. And my friends. And George. I've had an absolutely phemomenal lack of social life over the past month. Still, end of exams will be immediately followed by mammoth shopping trips and Hayley's birthday piss up. And a haircut at last.

Anyway, Luther is fabulous (and has a fabulous theme tune), I have nothing more to say here, so here's some Stratovarius. Rock n' roll is a fabulous thing.

Peace&Love

Of living in a dream.

I think I know how characters in dreams feel.
"Tell me how does it feel when the dreams become real".
Not that anything particularly interesting happened to me today. But yesterday, I was absolutely CONVINCED that it was Friday, but I know that tomorrow is Saturday. So today was kind of... nothing. The space in between.
"A place between sleep and awake".
I was just kind of walking around, living life as normal, but everything seemed numb and empty. I think it was partly because I'm really tired and it was the last day of term, but I kind of felt like I wasn't completely there. It was cold but I didn't feel it, I caught my semi-split nail so many times but barely noticed, I burnt my tongue on hot chocolate and didn't wince in pain. It was weird. Plus I was thankful that I managed not to impale myself on my sharp music folder.

English Literature really makes me think. Particularly Thomas Hardy. Other than comparing his poetry to episodes of the Moomins, it kind of puts human nature into words. Just as an example, take the first time I went a-wandering round town with George. We sat on a bench for hours just talked. It didn't even matter what we were talking about, just that we were there. But that place in town, it's been there for all the eternity of the world, under different names, and, prehistorically, attatched to Pangea or whatever. (I used to have a dinosaur obsession, I know what the first landmass was called.) It's probably seen absolutely loads of historical things, there's been miriads of people passing by, kings and queens, murderers, lovers, viking invasions... but, because the moment was special to me, I automatically associate that place with that event, even though it's one insignifigant event set against eternity.

Life is too short for memories to fade.

Peace & Love

Of encouraging comments and strange cravings.

I had parents evening at school today. Saw one of the teachers in Japanese and English, and both for music. I managed to get good comments from everyone, which was encouraging. This was probably due to my media studies teacher being ill and thus unable to attend. She's a great teacher and really lovely, but I am HORRIBLE at that subject.

It's been snowing again here. I love the snow, I just don't like how it mucks up all the public transport. I hate having to wait in the cold. Plus I'm getting a little bit bored of winter now. Even though I love it, I really want it to be summer so I can go out without freezing my arse off. Plus reading My Life Is A Mess has given me a massive craving for strawberries, which I never associate with winter.

What else... saw a string quartet at school today which was awesome. Media coursework still not done. Boyfriend away on Valentines Day so celebrating it on the Tuesday instead. Going for Chinese with Georgie etc. Pancakes and drunkeness with Hayley etc.

I cannot wait for half term.

Peace & Love

Of plaguing questions and disenchantment

I can't help but wonder what the answers to the following questions are:
-What would life be like if I was bilingual?
-What would life be like if I was completely alone?
-What would life be like if I never dwelled on mistakes and just let things go?
-What will life be like in fifty years time?
-Why is Pingu's dad always ironing when none of them wear any clothes?

Today I'm feeling... disenchanted. It's one of those days when I just want to be somewhere else, just leave and never look back. Though I'd never actually do this. I have escapism to do that for me. And I know that the feeling always passes. Life continues to mundanely roll by, but none of that matters because I know that I have it better than a lot of people. I'm grateful for what I have. There are people here that I'd never be able to leave behind.

And I absolutely love this writer.

Music today is Vivaldi, since I'm that awesome.


Peace & Love

Of snow, snow, and more snow

It's still snowing here in England. I was the only one of my family who went into school/work today. Typical. We found ourselves stuck in the common room with nothing but a hideously out-of-tune five string acoustic guitar (at least it was out of tune until Ed got hold of it), and my Finnish-English dictionary for company.

There were seven of us in media. SEVEN! And apparently my boots are not waterproof. I found this out the hard way.

I recently found my Sims disc again, so I've had much fun pissing around on there. I also ordered some new clothes and Brother Firetribe's album, Break Out. Unfortunately, due to the aformentioned snow, neither of these have been delivered. Nor has our new washing machine. Looks like tomorrow'll be another day of wearing the same jumper to school...

Peace & Love

Of A level exams and chocolatey missions

I had my first A/S exam today. Critical Thinking. What a bloody nightmare. It's a silly subject, but by Tuesday it'll ALL BE OVER! And I am so glad I did some revision even though both of our teachers and the textbook told me not to bother.

On the plus side, I found some new ambitions in life:

.Get a batchelor of arts degree in music.

.Assist Georgie and The Smithster with running their Californian bar.

.Introduce Finland to the concept of "Hole In The Wall."

Today we went on an epic chocolately mission. Upon discovering a box of chocolates in her and Natalie's locker, Jess thought "Ooh, a secret santa present!" since they're still coming in. So we ate some, and then Hayley dropped the bombshell - what if they were for Natalie? So she texted Natalie, and it emerged that they weren't hers, but Steph had been keeping them in the locker.

We panicked, and went down to the local shop to buy Steph some replacement chocolate. We managed to find the exact ones that were missing. Hayley slipped over in the snow in the process.

We got back to school, where we refilled the box of chocolates. Hayley gave it to Steph, and said "We're really sorry, Jess though these were for her so we ate some, but we've replaced all of them!"

Steph goes "Oh don't worry, they were a present for Jess anyway!"

Peace & Love

Of grinding halts and Nordic laughter

 I bloody love snow. The result is that this is the fourth day of a five day weekend.

Saying that, if I can't get in on Monday, I will have to do my critical thinking exam in June. Which means even more lessons.

I will walk if I have to.

(I don't know how realistic this is considering I live miles away from school).

Apparently France and Spain have freezing weather too. I think the whole of Europe may have moved slightly closer to the Arctic circle. Or not.  This weather makes me feel so English. One of those insanely British ways of life is that when we get a bit of snow, everything comes to a grinding halt. And now we're also running out of grit. Fantastic. All the Nordic countries are probably LAUGHING THEIR ARSES OFF. That said, we were actually colder than Finland yesterday. That's some achievment!

Speaking of Finland, today I learned that the Finnish phrase "Mitä tämä paska on?" means "What is this crap?"

I think this information will be invaluable.

Music is Brother Firetribe. I like listening to this in the mornings, it puts me in a good mood.

Peace & Love

Of midwinter magic and movie nights

Ironic that I woke up to Sacrament Of Wilderness.

"Naked in midwinter magic

Lies an angel in the snow

A frozen figure

Crossed by the tracks of wolves"

Nightwish - Sacrament Of Wilderness

Dad came in and told me it'd been snowing overnight, and he didn't know if we were going to be able to get into work and school. My first reaction was "Yay snow day!" Then I remembered that it was the last day of term, and I needed to give people their Christmas presents.

Then I looked out of the window.

Dad hadn't been exaggerating, there was six inches at least! Of course the school ended up being closed, so no one got their presents. Instead I went out in the snow with Hayley and her sister, and we watched some Christmas films. Since then I've got home, wrapped some more presents, and watched Pirates Of The Carribean. Now I'm on Spirited Away!

Peace & Love

Of Christmas raving and farewells

 Last night was one of the most epic moments of my life.

I had so much fun!

It was the day of Hayley's long awaited Christmas party. Becky brought crates of alchohol, but this time, I wasn't the only sober one. The uninvited guest never showed up. Several people told me they loved me. I got a chance to wear my awesome red shoes. We sung a very drunken rendition of My Heart Will Go On. Jon Bovi described the song as "magical" and I nearly did a spit - take with my lemonade. And I got covered in cat hair.

Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On

It was also the last time I could see George before he goes to New Zealand for three weeks over Christmas, so we did present swapping. He gave me some Malteasers and a bracelet which is pride of place next to my Camden one. And (though this is pretty much for Emi's benefit since she said she'd probably forget), I definitely did have my first kiss this time.

Overall it was one hell of a party!

Peace & Love

Of winter nights and memories

So, December.

Possibly one of my favourite months. I like July too. The year's nearly out already, and not only that but people are counting it as the end of the decade too. That's scary. Essentially it's my first full decade, since I missed out on 1991 and 1992.

This year's been great one, possibly one of the best in my life, even if it's had it's downers. There are some moments I'll remember for the rest of my life, even if they were just little things that made me laugh.

--Frozen Moments In Time--

14th February 2009 - I haven't had so many laughs in a looong time!

11th March 2009 - It was worth eating those chips to see Nightwish live.

8th May 2009 - STUDY LEAVE!

6th - 8th July 2009 - Leavers day, my birthday, Thorpe Park, what a combo!

29th August 2009 - When I got my GCSE results.

28th October 2009 - ♥

And from what I've heard, cheapskating isn't always a good thing. Particularly when the bus catches fire.

I hope everyone's ok.

I'm going to see 2012 with Emma and Hayley today. Fun times!

Not so long ago, I used to do a fair amount of art, even though I'm essentially crap at it. I don't have as much time to do so anymore, but I still love looking at it. Here's some awesome stuff I've found lately.
Light From Emirates
Bananca
Nordic Visions
Utherworlds
Jaques Resch

Peace & Love

Of winter wonderlands and dirty jokes

I redid the layout on this thing, to make it look more wintery. I like winter, as I've said before. Especially Christmas. I like hot soup and long coats and going to fairs and penguin-huddling with George. Which might be problematic since he's on the other side of the world during the holidays.

Hayley's having a Christmas party, B.Y.O.F.B, so it'll be another night of passive drunkeness with Jerk and Dipshit. Good times.

I heard the best dirty joke ever today:

A small child is staring at an old man who has a really small head. The boy says "why have you got such a small head?" The man said "One day, I was fishing and I accidentally caught a mermaid. She screamed 'Please release me, I'll grant you one wish!' so I said 'How about a little head?'

Peace & Love

Of British weather and procrastination

It's freezing in England.

Reminds me of the UNIQLO advert that's on telly at the moment. It talks about the temperatures in different cities. Tokyo 5°. New York 3°. London... -1°! I applied for a job never got back to me. at the shop once, but they

Sometimes I get days when I really can't be bothered. I don't know if I'm just tired but I have a massive lack of motivation at the moment. I like most of my subjects but music'simportant to me. Sometimes it feels like it's the only one that's the only one that's really... worth it.

Media studies is an absolute disaster. Note taking and such is fine, but the minute I get within a three meter radius of any kind of technology, everything falls apart. Plus we're doing compostition in music at the moment, which is DEFINITELY my weakest area. I'll spend like ten minutes writing and recording like, four bars of melody, then Emi and I will show them to each other and hers is always unbelievably good... I have this hook up that composing comes naturally to some people and I'm not one of them. Well, we'll see.

Me and George have been together for a week now. It's just a little amount of time, but it means a lot.

xx

And me and Emi are starting a band :)

Today's music is my favourite song at the moment, from Nightwish of course!

Nightwish - Ever Dream

Peace & Love

Of winter chills and longing

I think it's fair to say that summer's on it's way out. Or at least it is here in Kent. Yeah the skies are blue and clear, but it's absolutely freezing. I like summer, but I think I like winter more.

What I don't like is autumn and spring. The in between stages. I prefer the two extremes.

I miss the weirdest things about winter.

I miss the cold air whipping around my face.

I miss the smell of the rain and the artifical shine of the streetlamps when it's dark at half past four.

I miss that one frail bit of hope that we might actually have a white Christmas.

I miss the Doctor Who specials!

I miss the unbelievably long chat I have with Emi on Christmas day, and the marginally shorter one I have with Hayley,

I miss that one glorious week of doing fuck-all at school, and watching the upper sixth make a fool of the teachers on the last day. They said they might ban it, but if not, that's me in 2010!

I miss the weird things you find in Christmas Bazaars like a table full of sushi. And spending stupid amounts of money on raffle tickets knowing that I have no hope in hell of winning anything.

I miss wandering around town in the freezing cold, and only being able to afford one hot chocolate between us, resulting in us drinking it with three staws.

I miss the feel of the fire when the central heating just doesn't make the grade, so to speak.

I miss the coca-cola adverts and the things you always find on TV.

I miss it when the teachers at school let certain secrets about certain Christmas traditions slip and we all pretend to be shocked and upset when actually we've known for ages.

I miss how in primary school we used to pack things up into shoeboxes and send them as Christmas presents to children in less economically developed countries.

I miss the meal we have with Hayley's family where we play drunken board games and my brother gets pissed off because everyone picks on him.

I miss the unbelievably tacky light-up santas people have popping in and out of their chimneys.

And I miss all the Christmas raves I have with my friends.

Today's music reminds me of winter. Plus Nightwish are awesome.

Nightwish - Walking in the Air live at Hartwall Areena

Peace & Love