Of sun, sun and sun! (THIS POST IS FULL OF HAPPINESS.)

Images from WeHeartIt.

It's sunny! In England!
Needless to say I am in a very good mood right now.
I had a great weekend too - Saturday I went into town with Carmen to see a bunch of local bands (RAP-FUNK FTW) and got thrown filthy looks by posh women in a tie shop. I'm sorry, but I thought that the discussion of how Lady Gaga's Alejandro was actually a protest against the persecution of homosexuals was a pretty intelligent conversation. Sunday was town again with George, we got lost somehow and ended up in a children's playground. And all the while, the sun was shining. Summer's a-comin'... at last! Cue feelings of pure elation!
Tomorrow I'm off to investigate Nottingham uni which I'm really looking forward to, and City of London on Saturday. IF I MISS THE DOCTOR WHO FINALE I WILL CRY. But it doesn't really matter. It'll be on iPlayer.
Yesterday it actually hit me that I'm so close to seventeen. If there's one thing I've learnt in the past year, it's not to take anything or anyone for granted. And things don't just come to you. You have to grab hold of them with both hands and never let them go.

Not only am I in a good mood, but seeing other people happy is great too. Congratulations are in order to Smiffy! And Jukka Nevalainen.

Such a mood has to be accompanied by Brother Firetribe, so that's the music for today. I don't see my love of this man's vocal chords ending any time soon. Just to warn you.

Peace&Love

Of coming full circle.

 Image from WeHeartIt.

I had my first exam yesterday. Japanese A/S. I think it went alright, which is good. A million times better than the mock, so I'm pretty sure I've got more than an E this time round.
This got me thinking - it must've been almost a year since I started writing this thing. Upon checking, I discovered that sure enough, my first post here was made on the 25th May 2009. I initially started this thing up as a distraction from my GCSE exams (which now seem like they must've been so easy), and to avoid the unending shit that is daytime television whilst on study leave. Since then all kinds of things have happened to me, and now I'm back in exam season again. How time flies. What have I achieved in the past year?
Well, I've kept writing in this thing, unlike I ever have in diaries, which I guess shows some kind of commitment.
I've also gained some good GCSE grades, great additions to the iPod, and a boyfriend. I think it has been time well spent.
Well, right now it's stiflingly hot so I don't know why the hell I'm inside, plus the fact that I've only written two of the ten essays that have accumulated due to my spending all my time on Japanese.
I will leave you with today's music, one of the aforementioned fantastic iPod additions, the lovely Leverage.

Peace&Love

Of taking things seriously and cravings for cheesecake.

 Picture from WeHeartIt. I recently discovered this site. It's awesome.

Right now, I'm on home study. And I actually did some studying. This is me, taking things seriously. John Tavener has been thoroughly scrutinised. But hey, the sun is shining. For once. And I really fancy some cheesecake. I had some when I was at Wagamamas with Emma and Zoe (I can't do funny accents on my computer) and the other Emma and Ash and Moos and that other guy who's name I can't remember, and I've been craving it since then. Whoever decided to put cheese in a cake is actually a genius.

Sooo... we still have no government, so to speak. Political envy of the world? I think so. Or not.

Errrm I saw George for the first time in ages yesterday, which I guess was for an extremely belated six months. It was awesomesauce of course. We wandered around singing Eiffel 65 and talking about gene pools.

Exams are HIDEOUSLY CLOSE and due to my school being a monumental fuck up I have no study leave for the hardest one! Ah well.

So, home study is nearly over and I need to actually leave for school in less than twenty minutes, so goodbye for now.

Today's music is BLACK SABBATH. I should really stop watching so many programmes about metal.

Peace&Love

Of rebirth and art.

I SAW A DAFFODIL TODAY.
My life is so interesting.

So, Easter. Also my younger brother's birthday. A time of celebration, of thankfullness.

Of rebirth.

I've noticed that a few people have been turning over new leaves with their blogs and such, but I don't really want to do that. I like reflecting over what's already happened. Even though my computer made loads of shitting pointless typos in my old posts for no reason whatsoever.

What I have done, however, is started drawing again.

My confidence kind of took a massive knock when I did so shit in my GCSE, and I kind of haven't drawn anything properly since. Just doodling. But lately I realised, yeah my coursework and such was fucking awful, but the only way I can change that is by practicing.

I'm so glad I didn't do A Level. I would hate it. I would be knee deep in shit by now. I wouldn't be doing Japanese, which I've come to love. But the best part is that now I can just draw the things that I want, and not what's going to get me the most marks. I prefer to keep it as a hobby, since music's gone way past that now. It's got to the point where it's like the second most important thing in my life (after the people close to me). And that's sad.

Today's music is Serj Tankian, who remains in my last.fm top fifteen. Along with My Chemical Romance. And Vivaldi. And Sonata Arctica. I don't know how the fuck this happened.



Peace&Love

Of gentle music and rowdy behaviour.

Waking up today was the weirdest sensation. I was still wearing my clothes minus jewellery and jacket, and I was lying on the floor in a sleeping bag surrounded by empty lager cans and bottles of Woo Woo. The sunlight was gently streaming through the curtains, people were just beginning to stir, and Josh (who will be forever immortalised by the fact that he had a dream about being raped by Spongebob Squarepants) was playing this gentle music on an acoustic guitar. I'm normally really grouchy in the morning, especially since this particular night I had got about three hours sleep, but something about the whole atmosphere... it's been a while since I felt so calm, or content.

For yesterday was the day of Georgie's infamous birthday party. As expected, a complete rave. Lady Gaga was appreciated, onion rings were consumed, alchohol was drunk, awful jokes were told, discussions about dreams were had, and pictures of Johnny Depp were unceremoniously oggled. I barely got any sleep - we went to bed at like half two, rested for twenty minutes, got back up and talked until ten to five in the morning. Needless to say, I am knackered. I think Ed was the only one who got any sleep, being as he passed out around midnight and was completely out of it, even when we got Georgie's dog to lick marmite off his face. All in all, another great night.

[And it's me & George's five months today!]

Today's music is in spirit of last night.


Peace & Love

Of songs and numbers.

Myself In Five Songs:

1. Escapist - Nightwish

I think I've mentioned this before, but I'll say it again. Even though everything in my life is fine, I still want to get out sometimes. I do this by daydreaming, pretty much. When I'm brought back to reality, it sometimes feels like I'm trapped, even if reality's not all that bad. Also, at times I feel really down for no apparent reason, just because I've become disenchanted with everything, and the dreaming helps me then too. This song pretty much represents that. I've been like this for as long as I can remember, so when I first heard the song, I was a bit startled! It's so like me it's uncanny.

2. I'm On Fire - Brother Firetribe

 Assuming that fire here is a metaphor for being over the moon, as opposed to having a MASSIVE HARD ON. Back at Hayley's Christmas party I had my first proper kiss (in her bedroom, ha ha!), and for the rest of the night I was basically mooning around in a semi-dream, helping people downstairs, lying about the time to get them to sober up quicker and being a dettol-meister with Becky. I was so excited about the whole thing, so the song kinda represents that.

3. Eternal Life - Jeff Buckley

 There's all kinds of shit going on in the world, and I just kinda wish it would all stop. That's kind of what the song is about. Simple as that.

4. Nothing - PAIN

 I have a few insecurities about not being accepted and not getting anywhere. The song's true - no matter what you have there'll always be something more, and eventually people destroy themselves trying to get it. The darker side of human nature.

5. The Angry Mob - Kaiser Chiefs

It's no secret that I'm not a massive fan of this country. The politics, the weather, AND THE IDIOTIC DRIVERS WHO COME SPEEDING ROUND THE CORNER AND NEARLY RUN YOU OVER THEN YELL AT YOU LIKE IT'S YOUR FAULT. This song's kind of just a depiction of mundane Britishness.
But here's the thing - I know perfectly well that my dreams would be far easier to achieve if I were to move to another country, but I'd never be able to do that, not really. I'm bound here by the people I'd leave behind. And actually, I'm ok with that.

Peace & Love

Of 60-man-strong pissups and skateboards.

Revelation of the day: The worst thing ever is when you reach into a packet of mini cheddars, expecting to get the last one, only to discover that you've already eaten it.
Go me and my fast metabolism.

Yesterday I went to an uncle's birthday party, where I met loads of distant relatives and family friends who I didn't know existed.
My Dad's brother's wife's brother's daughter is a fellow Nightwish fan.
My Dad's cousin's son's girlfriend is a Portuguese mime artist.
I think my family is a bit awesome. Insane on every level, but awesome.

Today I attempting skateboarding. George was trying to teach me, and let's be honest, I was SHIT, but it was fun all the same. Plus I got a peculiar sense of self-worth when I was able to tell the desperate F1 fan what the results of the Grand Prix had been. Though he was annoyed at the result (1. Alonso 2. Massa 3. Hamilton), I still, y'know, helped him.
Kinda.

I really don't want to go back to school tomorrow. This is made essentially worse by home study in the morning, so by the time I get around to leaving I'll be dreading it even more.
But I' still rather have a lie in.

Today's music I'm pretty sure is originally Guns 'n Roses. Sung by the amazing beardman.


Peace & Love

Of flowers and inappropriate footwear.

Today saw even more media studies. We have pretty much all of the filming done now, which is good. One piece of hellish coursework will soon be done and dusted. Living up to expectations, I wore the wrong kind of shoes. Again. This always seems to happen to me, I've ended up wearing boots on the beach before! Today I had red heels on, not realising that we were going to go and film in a MUDDY field. Ah well.
Anyway, I got home complete with mud-caked shoes, and was greeted with a surprise delivery.

Turns out that, knowing that I would be out, George had come round to my house on his way to a football match and dropped these off (belated Valentines day). I've never had flowers before so I was over the moon! I know he won't read this, but thank you!

Peace & Love

Of living in a dream.

I think I know how characters in dreams feel.
"Tell me how does it feel when the dreams become real".
Not that anything particularly interesting happened to me today. But yesterday, I was absolutely CONVINCED that it was Friday, but I know that tomorrow is Saturday. So today was kind of... nothing. The space in between.
"A place between sleep and awake".
I was just kind of walking around, living life as normal, but everything seemed numb and empty. I think it was partly because I'm really tired and it was the last day of term, but I kind of felt like I wasn't completely there. It was cold but I didn't feel it, I caught my semi-split nail so many times but barely noticed, I burnt my tongue on hot chocolate and didn't wince in pain. It was weird. Plus I was thankful that I managed not to impale myself on my sharp music folder.

English Literature really makes me think. Particularly Thomas Hardy. Other than comparing his poetry to episodes of the Moomins, it kind of puts human nature into words. Just as an example, take the first time I went a-wandering round town with George. We sat on a bench for hours just talked. It didn't even matter what we were talking about, just that we were there. But that place in town, it's been there for all the eternity of the world, under different names, and, prehistorically, attatched to Pangea or whatever. (I used to have a dinosaur obsession, I know what the first landmass was called.) It's probably seen absolutely loads of historical things, there's been miriads of people passing by, kings and queens, murderers, lovers, viking invasions... but, because the moment was special to me, I automatically associate that place with that event, even though it's one insignifigant event set against eternity.

Life is too short for memories to fade.

Peace & Love

Of encouraging comments and strange cravings.

I had parents evening at school today. Saw one of the teachers in Japanese and English, and both for music. I managed to get good comments from everyone, which was encouraging. This was probably due to my media studies teacher being ill and thus unable to attend. She's a great teacher and really lovely, but I am HORRIBLE at that subject.

It's been snowing again here. I love the snow, I just don't like how it mucks up all the public transport. I hate having to wait in the cold. Plus I'm getting a little bit bored of winter now. Even though I love it, I really want it to be summer so I can go out without freezing my arse off. Plus reading My Life Is A Mess has given me a massive craving for strawberries, which I never associate with winter.

What else... saw a string quartet at school today which was awesome. Media coursework still not done. Boyfriend away on Valentines Day so celebrating it on the Tuesday instead. Going for Chinese with Georgie etc. Pancakes and drunkeness with Hayley etc.

I cannot wait for half term.

Peace & Love

Of plaguing questions and disenchantment

I can't help but wonder what the answers to the following questions are:
-What would life be like if I was bilingual?
-What would life be like if I was completely alone?
-What would life be like if I never dwelled on mistakes and just let things go?
-What will life be like in fifty years time?
-Why is Pingu's dad always ironing when none of them wear any clothes?

Today I'm feeling... disenchanted. It's one of those days when I just want to be somewhere else, just leave and never look back. Though I'd never actually do this. I have escapism to do that for me. And I know that the feeling always passes. Life continues to mundanely roll by, but none of that matters because I know that I have it better than a lot of people. I'm grateful for what I have. There are people here that I'd never be able to leave behind.

And I absolutely love this writer.

Music today is Vivaldi, since I'm that awesome.


Peace & Love

Of potential pub brawls and Shakespearean views

I have recently realised that my entire view of life is based on Romeo And Juliet.

I believe that love and hate always come in pairs. Like binary oppositions in media studies. One cannot exist without the other. If there is no hate, how can you know what love is?

However, I also firmly believe that love will triumph in the end. Although Romeo and Juliet take their own lives, they are together in death, and their families are brought together in grief. As long as someone is always holding on to that hope that love will triumph, then one day that hope will become a reality. If hope is lost, then what? Losing hope can have disasterous effects, both physically and mentally, and I've seen what it can do to a person. Although I'd really rather not go into that.

Ok, enough pensive-ness for the moment. The soundtrack to the Romeo and Juliet filmbought in town today. I went there with brought it on, which I Emi and Georgie, where they planned the conception of their Californian bar. I don't think my interjections of "Finns!" at random intervals were particularly helpful, but hey, you can't have everything in life. My apparent ability to be a deep thinker is balanced with the fact that I have no idea when to shut up.

Today's music is from the soundtrack.

Peace & Love

Of thinking critically

Ten Things I Would Rather Do Than Critical Thinking A/S

(In order of preference)

1. Talk to my friends/boyfriend.

2. Listen to some form of Finnish metal.

3. Eat some soup.

4. Play on the Wii.

5. Decorate a t-shirt.

6. Have a music test.

7. Be ill.

8. Spend three hours in a locked room with a LIVE BEAR.

9. Eat my own foot.

10. Travel billions of lightyears across the universe with nothing but a haggis to guide me.

Peace & Love

Of wii failings and curls

My brother has been thrashing me at Formula 1 racing on the Wii. If I were actually controlling the cars, Heikki Kovalainen would never be the same again.

I've been attempting to curl my hair recently. I don't know if "successful" is the way I'd describe it, but it's definetely getting there.

Currently I'm watching Corpse Bride, which is pretty cool.

George is back in the country at last, but with a hefty bill from texting me whilst in New Zealand... oops!

It was the last EVER episode of Doctor Who with David Tennant as the lead role. I nearly cried my eyes out.

I'm seeing family tomorrow, and getting remaining Christmas presents. In the meantime, I would like to express that I love Pekka Heino's voice. (Music Junkiness?)

Peace & Love

Of new beginnings and faded memories

This year I:

Was proud of five GCSE results (I took seven this year)

.B in maths

.A's in English language, additional science and music

.A* in Japanese

Tried four things for the first time

.Playing the bass

.Being vegetarian

.Learning a new language (fairly unsuccesfully)

.Media studies

Saw three bands live

.Kaiser Chiefs

.Nightwish ♥

.Blur

Kicked two bad habits

.Biting my nails

.Being hideously disorganised

Got asked out once.

 -------------------------------

Next year I will

.Work more

.Spend less

.Take nothing for granted

First music post of 2010 goes to Leverage. Not many songs make me cry, but this nearly did.

Peace & Love

Of Christmas raving and farewells

 Last night was one of the most epic moments of my life.

I had so much fun!

It was the day of Hayley's long awaited Christmas party. Becky brought crates of alchohol, but this time, I wasn't the only sober one. The uninvited guest never showed up. Several people told me they loved me. I got a chance to wear my awesome red shoes. We sung a very drunken rendition of My Heart Will Go On. Jon Bovi described the song as "magical" and I nearly did a spit - take with my lemonade. And I got covered in cat hair.

Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On

It was also the last time I could see George before he goes to New Zealand for three weeks over Christmas, so we did present swapping. He gave me some Malteasers and a bracelet which is pride of place next to my Camden one. And (though this is pretty much for Emi's benefit since she said she'd probably forget), I definitely did have my first kiss this time.

Overall it was one hell of a party!

Peace & Love

Of winter nights and memories

So, December.

Possibly one of my favourite months. I like July too. The year's nearly out already, and not only that but people are counting it as the end of the decade too. That's scary. Essentially it's my first full decade, since I missed out on 1991 and 1992.

This year's been great one, possibly one of the best in my life, even if it's had it's downers. There are some moments I'll remember for the rest of my life, even if they were just little things that made me laugh.

--Frozen Moments In Time--

14th February 2009 - I haven't had so many laughs in a looong time!

11th March 2009 - It was worth eating those chips to see Nightwish live.

8th May 2009 - STUDY LEAVE!

6th - 8th July 2009 - Leavers day, my birthday, Thorpe Park, what a combo!

29th August 2009 - When I got my GCSE results.

28th October 2009 - ♥

And from what I've heard, cheapskating isn't always a good thing. Particularly when the bus catches fire.

I hope everyone's ok.

I'm going to see 2012 with Emma and Hayley today. Fun times!

Not so long ago, I used to do a fair amount of art, even though I'm essentially crap at it. I don't have as much time to do so anymore, but I still love looking at it. Here's some awesome stuff I've found lately.
Light From Emirates
Bananca
Nordic Visions
Utherworlds
Jaques Resch

Peace & Love

Of uncertainty and Leverage

I think I had my first kiss yesterday.

Well... only if it counts if it lasted about half a second and then the other party RAN FOR THE HILLS (or in this case, the toilet.)

Hmm. Encouraging? It was fun times anyway.

I'm bored. Not that this is any revelation. Did my first coursework essay today. English literature. The only bit of Shakespeare we do on the whole course. Done and dusted.

Two years ago, that would've been good news.

How things change.

It's thundering outside. The shitty British weather has reached us again. Though I don't mind thunderstorms. As long as I'm inside when they happen.

I have to go back to the orthodontist on Tuesday. I thought I was through with that shit.

Apparently not.

Today's music is Leverge, who I discovered yesterday and got hooked on in less than half an hour. Must be some kind of record. The guy's voice hit me like a tonne of bricks.

Leverage - Mister Universe

Peace & Love

Of winter wonderlands and dirty jokes

I redid the layout on this thing, to make it look more wintery. I like winter, as I've said before. Especially Christmas. I like hot soup and long coats and going to fairs and penguin-huddling with George. Which might be problematic since he's on the other side of the world during the holidays.

Hayley's having a Christmas party, B.Y.O.F.B, so it'll be another night of passive drunkeness with Jerk and Dipshit. Good times.

I heard the best dirty joke ever today:

A small child is staring at an old man who has a really small head. The boy says "why have you got such a small head?" The man said "One day, I was fishing and I accidentally caught a mermaid. She screamed 'Please release me, I'll grant you one wish!' so I said 'How about a little head?'

Peace & Love

Of British weather and procrastination

It's freezing in England.

Reminds me of the UNIQLO advert that's on telly at the moment. It talks about the temperatures in different cities. Tokyo 5°. New York 3°. London... -1°! I applied for a job never got back to me. at the shop once, but they

Sometimes I get days when I really can't be bothered. I don't know if I'm just tired but I have a massive lack of motivation at the moment. I like most of my subjects but music'simportant to me. Sometimes it feels like it's the only one that's the only one that's really... worth it.

Media studies is an absolute disaster. Note taking and such is fine, but the minute I get within a three meter radius of any kind of technology, everything falls apart. Plus we're doing compostition in music at the moment, which is DEFINITELY my weakest area. I'll spend like ten minutes writing and recording like, four bars of melody, then Emi and I will show them to each other and hers is always unbelievably good... I have this hook up that composing comes naturally to some people and I'm not one of them. Well, we'll see.

Me and George have been together for a week now. It's just a little amount of time, but it means a lot.

xx

And me and Emi are starting a band :)

Today's music is my favourite song at the moment, from Nightwish of course!

Nightwish - Ever Dream

Peace & Love